I've got some friends who think Valentine's Day is just a reason in the middle of a very cold month for the greeting card cartel to make a little extra from those of us still hard-pressed to pay our Christmas bills.
...and I guess anything is what you think it is - if that's what you think.
So, rather than argue, I just want to tell you how much I love my wife and beautiful babies every day, how Liam and Morgan have been on their best behaviour this morning, and very loving, which is nice for Valentine's Day, and I wish you the same kind of blessings in your life as I have in mine.
...but today is also a very sad day for me - because a man I consider one of the best men I've ever met, a decent and loving father of three daughters, and someone I've been lucky enough to call a friend - is being buried tomorrow.
Gary was only 54. I met him while working at home in Halifax. I had a talk radio morning show, and at the time, he was media relations officer for the Halifax Regional Police Service. He had already written a letter to the radio station complimenting our morning show, so I was obviously happy to have him a regular contributor to the show, but I didn't realize then how great a relationship would develop between us.
Gary loved the Toronto Maple Leafs - so much so, that they were mentioned in his obituary which ran in the Chronicle-Herald in Halifax earlier this week. I am including it below. Hockey was one of our favourite subjects, because he knew I'm a big Montreal fan, and a good enough guy - and one of the few people - to acknowledge that it made sense that I was a Habs fan, since my mother had grown up in the city. Gary also played on our radio station's hockey team, and was tremendously athletic. He and I had wonderful verbal jousting battles over our respective favourite NHL teams, and it was always fun and light. There were no hurt feelings, there was no name-calling, there was no sulking - just good-natured fun, and a lot of laughter.
Laughter.
Good God, Gary was a big man. He was obviously 6-ft-something-around-8-or-9, but he was at least 7 feet tall to me. When he laughed, you couldn't miss it. It came from way deep down inside his massive frame, and it pulled in everyone within earshot.
Gary and I shared something else...the passion for being involved in the community, although he was far better at it than I. One of the things we were both involved in was ringette. I coached a ringette team in his hometown of Bedford, and he was a referee for the league. I used to call him over to the boards during games and offer him five dollar bills to go easy on my team. He'd smile wide, and bellow, "Put that away! You're in trouble now!" - and skate away to get back to his officiating.
Gary had left the force, and had become a city councillor for Halifax Regional Municipality, but he hadn't been one for very long - before he got the news of his
illness. He was a man who you know would have made a difference in many more lives, had he had the chance to continue. He certainly made a huge difference in mine.
Damn cancer all to Hell.
The last time I made it back to Halifax, in 2000, Gary was still with the Police, and the Swiss Air Flight 111 crash off of Peggy's Cove was still very fresh in everyone's memory. One of the people I felt I needed to see during that week was my friend Gary - so he and his wife, Darlene, took Janne and I out to a restaurant in Bedford, and Darlene and Gary told Janne and I many stories surrounding the disaster. One story Gary told remains as clear to me as the day he told it to us. It was of a passenger, who had a brother he hadn't seen in many years, who was going to teach him the game of golf.
In case you're not familiar with the story of Swiss Air 111 - no one survived.
So, after the tragedy, which left the brother without his sibling, the Halifax Police (and this is so typical of the hearts of Maritimers) arranged to give the man a set of golf clubs, and they had golf balls made up with his brother's name on them. They took him out to Peggy's Cove, and, as his hosts looked on, he hit the golf balls out to his brother, into the sea.
As I sit here, missing my friend, I feel I must tell you that I'll be wearing a Toronto Maple Leafs jersey today, and every February 10th - the night we lost Gary - for the rest of my life.
This is the first Valentine's Day in my life where I have told a man I love him, and I'm sure he'd have a great laugh over both the Leafs jersey, and that.
I love you, Gary Martin. 'Til we meet again.
Go here: http://thechronicleherald.ca/Front/1037510.html
MARTIN, Gary Vincent - Halifax Regional Police, Retired. 54, Bedord, passed away February 10, 2008, in the Palliative Care Unit, VG Site, QEII. He was the son of the late Albert and Marjorie Martin. Gary served with the HRP for 26 years before moving on as manager of the Community Response Team, and later became the City Councillor for District 21, Bedford. He was an active member of his community. Gary served on numerous committees, sports teams and volunteer initiatives. Gary enjoyed life to the fullest and touched the hearts of everyone he met. He enjoyed motorcycling, hockey, ball, and his Toronto Maple Leafs, but most of all, he loved his family. He is survived by his wife, Darlene (Conrad); daughters, Cynthia Bernasky (John), Dartmouth; Christa Martin (Aubrie), Ottawa; Candace Martin, Bedford; sister, Annamarie Hatcher (Bruce), Sydney; grandson, Ryan Bernasky. He was predeceased by granddaughter, Bailey Foulkes. Visitation will be held in the Burnside Ramada, Burnside, on Thursday, February 14, 2-4 and 7-9 p.m. Funeral in St. Mary's Basilica, Halifax, on Friday, February 15, at 10 a.m., Father Lloyd O'Neil officiating, assisted by Father Thomas Maybe. Private interment at a later date. Gary's family requests that people send stories about how Gary touched their lives. These will be used to help his grandchildren know what an amazing person he was. Please send to Martin Family c/o 1600 Bedford Highway, Suite 100-441, Bedford, NS B4A 1E8. Donations to the Canadian Cancer Society or Gary Martin Endowment Fund, c/o Bedford United Church, 1200 Bedford Highway, Bedford, NS B4A 1C3.
